Your Collective - Mind, Body & Spiritual Balance
Your Collective is a space where we explore the ways in which we can calm and quiet the mind, so that we can tune into and listen to our bodies and ultimately listen to the whisper of what our soul desires. How do we connect the trifecta so that they can work together in harmony and unity?
Your Collective - Mind, Body & Spiritual Balance
Breaking Cycles and Embracing Change
Have you ever wondered how childhood experiences shape our adult lives? Join us for an eye-opening conversation with Helen Nguyen, an NLP therapist and owner of Empower Your Life Coaching. Helen shares her profound journey into the world of Neuro-Linguistic Programming, driven by her desire to understand her own mind. Together, we explore how ingrained behavioral patterns and subconscious programming from our early years can significantly impact our future relationships, career, and personal growth. Helen's insights as both a therapist and a mother bring a unique perspective to understanding human behavior and development.
Workplace conflicts can often feel like an endless cycle. We tackle this issue head-on, discussing the importance of self-awareness and personal accountability in resolving repetitive conflicts. Inspired by Byron Katie's book, "I Need Your Love - Is That True?", we share personal experiences that highlight the challenge of breaking negative thought cycles. Helen and I emphasize the necessity of questioning our own contributions to these conflicts and the power of visualization techniques to interrupt and change these patterns. It's a candid discussion on the patience and practice required for genuine behavioral change.
Our conversation broadens to the transformative journey of life coaching and the emotional impact of significant life transitions. From personal stories of spiritual questioning and rebirth to the importance of holistic health and generational healing, we cover it all. We discuss how unaddressed emotional wounds can manifest physically and the critical role of emotional catharsis in overall well-being. Helen's wisdom on addressing generational trauma and fostering emotional growth across generations underscores the lasting influence of our loved ones. Tune in to gain valuable insights and transformative advice that could change the way you approach your emotional health and relationships.
Good morning, good afternoon, good evening and welcome to Y Collective. My name is S Alexander, your host of Y Collective Today. I start with a question to you have you ever observed in your own life, or even the lives of people around you, repetitive or cyclical types of behaviors, or even thoughts in your own case? If it refers to you, and if that is the case, then today is absolutely the place where you should be, because I will be joined today by Helen Nugent, owner of Empower your Life Coaching, and Helen is an NLP therapist.
Sherisse Alexander:And if you don't know what an NLP therapist is, it's someone who works with clients around neuro-lingu, linguistic programming, and really what you're looking at working through are those repetitive behaviors or thought patterns that are on repeat. So an example would be somebody who has the same kind of love story will say they meet someone, they fall in love in three seconds and it's fast and it's furious, and then it quickly ends. That's an example, or anything really, where it just seems like we end up in the exact same behavioral type of situations. And today Helen will be chatting with us about a little bit about NLP and what that journey looks like. So, without further ado, please welcome Helen Ngyuen as we dive into NLP work. Hello, Helen, and thank you so much for joining me today on Your Collective Welcome. Welcome, welcome and thank you for joining me.
Helen Ngyuen:Thank you for having me. It's such an honor to be here.
Sherisse Alexander:And thank you for joining me, thank you for having me. It's such an honor to be here, yes, and I'm going to tip my hat to you from the very beginning and say the only reason this podcast actually saw the light of day is because you were one of the people actually were probably my strongest advocate that was pushing, pushing. Whenever I got scared, you'd be like, no, you got to get it out there. So we're going to tip our hat and say thank you to Helen. If you enjoy the content that I put out, you can thank Helen to some degree in helping me to get over my fear of what I needed to say.
Helen Ngyuen:So thank you, you're very welcome. Yes, I think sorry to interrupt you, but I just wanted to add something to that as well. You know, charisse, I am really I'm commending you right now for having the courage to actually put forth your best foot. In doing so, I think you're doing a disservice to the public and people out there not being able to get to know you and hear your messages, and I think it's amazing that you're doing that.
Sherisse Alexander:Yes, well, thank you. Like I said, you've walked with me for a little bit now, so you know the journey that it was to get me to actually put my voice out there, so thank you for supporting me within that. So, today, what I was hoping we could dive into a little bit more, and it's been some of the stuff that we've had several conversations about. But how do we begin to change the narrative of? You know the stories that we're telling ourselves, but before we go deep, real quick, why don't you tell the audience a little bit about who you are, what you do, how you got to this point in what it is that you do?
Helen Ngyuen:Okay, so my name is Helen Nguyen. I've actually embarked on this journey of self-realization for a couple of decades actually, and I believe that you know going through life, you know you have a lot many challenges, many uphills that you have to climb right, and I'm pretty sure everyone can attest to that, that they have their own journey. It looks very similar, it's just different contents in it. So how I became an NLP practitioner and life coaching was, truthfully, I just wanted to understand more about my own brainwaves and how I think of things and just to kind of try to figure out my own path, and that actually started about 10 years ago. And as I embarked on this journey, I realized that you know what. There is something here and you know our brain waves, actually our memories, at a subconscious level.
Helen Ngyuen:We are actually programmed at a very young age because everything that we've learned like if you, if you think of it this way, like a young age because everything that we've learned like if you, if you think of it this way, like when you were born, you didn't know how to speak at all. So what did you embark on, which is energy, right? So how you feel and how you react to things was all taught to you as well at that age how to be happy. So what does happy look like? You know, why are you sad, why do you automatically pout your lips and start crying, right, like all these things? And you, you have to ask yourself to say at a subconscious level, why would you react that way and why is it so evident that it is kind of like imprinted, like a step right and you can't get rid of it. And as you get older and through stages and that's why, for myself, like, learning about this helped me, um, learned more about myself, right, and understanding what my purpose is here.
Helen Ngyuen:So that's how I became an NLP practitioner in life coaching. Really, um, it was like this desire to get to know more of how I've become. And then it just so happened that I'm able to help others figure out their lifeline so that on their path, they can change their future. So when they say you know, you know, you repeat what your ancestor has done. Yes, you do, because that's also embedded in your DNA. But how you change the future is how you change your thought patterns, right? So I am also a mother of two. My oldest is 20 and my youngest is turning 11 right away, which is kind of crazy, because when I tell people that they're like you have a 20 year old.
Helen Ngyuen:No nobody believes me. Let me tell you, Sherisse, but um, I think that that is. The greatest job that I have is being a mother.
Helen Ngyuen:And I think that has enabled me to learn at different levels in life, because they always say you know, if a child can't change you, nothing can Right, and they have. So my daughter was actually. I would say that she actually saved my life. You know me, being a mother at the age of 24 has changed my views on life, and I think that's where it all began, where I actually really thought about you know, what can I do to be better? And it's not just for myself. Now. This is how you learn. To be selfless. Is when you become a parent right when you don't have children? And I'm not. I'm not knocking down people who don't have children, don't get me wrong. I'm just saying that you know, like that's where my journey was and how my life changed around for the better.
Helen Ngyuen:And it has helped me to become wiser because I I had to. You know, it took survival to another level, if that makes sense.
Sherisse Alexander:Yeah, you know, and obviously you know that my kids are older as well. At what point, you know, it's really only in these latter these, I'll say, maybe in the last five to seven years with my kids, that I can genuinely see how they teach me. Like they'll, you know, sometimes I'll say to you like you know, so-and-so said this thing, and it just like was like light bulb, went on. I totally understood something I was grappling with. Has it been like that for you as well? Because, I mean, our kids are always teaching us things. It's when we become cognizant of what they're actually teaching us. Because I think for a long time, parents have been of the mindset of I'm teaching my kids. Yes, we teach them to a certain extent, but at what point do we realize that at least maybe for you that, oh my gosh, I'm learning so much from these, like actually from them and the experience of being their parent?
Helen Ngyuen:Or was it always? For me, I think it has always been like that. I always reflect back on whatever situation that was, whether or not they are adolescent or a baby. You know, as you're teaching them and you're watching their reactions, you're also recording all of that as data, right, and you're also learning, because you know your mind is a very powerful thing. As soon as you think of something and you teach it to them and then you see their reaction, that is the outcome of what that teaching is right, and it's the exact same thing as when they do something. It sends the same way links to you and now you're reacting to it. So then you ultimately have a certain outcome as well.
Helen Ngyuen:Right, so that actually gets recorded. So I think that for me it always has been, ever since they were born, because if you think about you know anybody who has become a parent for the very first time. They don't know what to expect. That is when you actually learn the most is because you have no idea what to expect, and you can read all the parenting books out there in the world, out there right now. Still, it's not uniquely to yours.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah absolutely Very interesting yours yeah, absolutely very interesting.
Sherisse Alexander:It is very interesting and um. So you know, with that in mind, in terms of um, you know, you said that what started you on the journey was really an inquiry into yourself, and I think that's where was it. Was there something that was like a catalyst within that, like something where you're like I'm it's not usual that people are like I'm gonna make a study of myself. I think there's usually a catalyst, some kind of crisis moment where we're like something I'm the common denominator let me look at Was there. Was it similar for you then, in that sense, where you started to look at?
Helen Ngyuen:yourself. It was very similar because when you go through events that, like I would say, when you go through like hardships in life right, whether it's financially being, you know hardships is one of the major ones Whether going through family hardships as well, but going through those things really, really helps you identify what your strengths and weaknesses are. And at that point I mean when most people they, you know they live very unhappy. Why? It's because of everything that's surrounding them right now that's negative, or they've gone through a negative point in their life, right when they feel low and for me it was actually hitting rock bottom, you know and trying to figure out how to live life.
Helen Ngyuen:And when you have, you know you do have supportive family, but it's not the same then you really have to look at yourself. You come to a juncture where you look at yourself and you're like why am I doing this? Why am I here? I mean, you start questioning your existence and you start questioning how come everything you do doesn't work? Just Just when you thought you knew. Just remember back in your 20s Okay, that was the most you know. For some people that was the funnest time, but for me it was the hardest time. I believe that is because you know I really struggled in understanding who I am, even at a teenager, for instance. You know, because I wasn't very confident growing up and being from an immigrant family. You know it's like you're the minority right and growing up it was really hard, but we weren't taught how to express our emotions as well.
Helen Ngyuen:So, you held everything, everything in. So imagine it was like a ticking time bomb, that's, you know, gonna go off at any second, right so. But when you explode, you have no idea where that comes from.
Helen Ngyuen:It could be something so minute, where it just kind of tipped you over and then all of a sudden, this word bomb, it just start coming out and all these emotions coming out, it's almost like coming out. It's almost like opening up a jar that is like so full that you don't know where it came from. Right, and rightfully so, you would, I would sit there and I would actually think to myself oh my God, like, what do you want for me? That's the question out of anger. What you want from me? Yeah, exactly. But when you start asking those questions and then you start feeling the calmness after, like this is my experience, yeah, from anger to calmness and then having to be still and not do anything.
Helen Ngyuen:At that given point, I started questioning who am I? It was really interesting because you know how you react to things is truthfully, really. That's embedded in your subconscious mind. It's like this narrative that you keep playing away and it plays in the background.
Sherisse Alexander:You didn't even know it, which is a great segue into. So you're bumping along through life, for lack of putting it a better way, and I think we all see examples of this around us, even if not in our own life, and you're like why does this thing keep happening? Why, like, why, why, why. And we, we like, let's not even make it about relationships, let's make it a job. I go to a job, things are great for the first three months, and then month four, inevitably, this thing starts like I'm having conflict with my colleagues or my boss, or whatever the case may be. And so you switch jobs, and you switch jobs, and you switch jobs and you're asking, like you know how, why does this keep happening?
Sherisse Alexander:Now, first is recognizing. Okay, great, maybe it's me, cause I think where people usually want to go is it's everybody else. I think where people usually want to go is it's everybody else, it's not me. But then you go okay, maybe it is me on some level. So how do you? It seems like a silly question to say, like, how do you recognize it? But even once you've recognized it, because now the question is okay, great, now what? Now I see that I'm willing to accept and acknowledge that I'm part of the cycle or the pattern that I'm trying to break. Now, what do I do with it? What would you? What would you say? What do we do?
Helen Ngyuen:Well, it just depends. Like, if you're asking yourself and you're aware of how you react to things like, say, how do you? How would you answer that to yourself? Do you say I can't do this anymore because that's generally what plays along a lot right? Um, I'll give you an example for myself. Um, I never thought that I was good enough, always reason why is because growing up? Always reason, why is because growing up, um, there was an incident when I believe I was in like grade four or grade five and I actually am very economically like smart, like I can especially math, right, I'm, I'm very good with numbers. Um, I've always gotten really good grades in math. I would come home and I remember that time and I believe I have like 85 to 90 percent on my test right, brought it home, great mark. You know what I mean. But the reaction from, like, say, my parents was well, what happened to that 10 percent?
Sherisse Alexander:yep so what plays.
Helen Ngyuen:What's your reaction to that? My reaction was that wasn't good enough. Yeah, so that played through in other areas of my life as well, not knowing back through mine. It's like, okay, I did this and did this, so the perception of being perfect has now been programmed in your mind, so everything you need to make it perfect, otherwise it's like it causes this rift and this stressful moments in your life where you just either do it or you just quit, yeah, right, and it's very tough. So, again, like that's when you start noticing these patterns and that's why I pushed you into doing your podcast, because it doesn't have to be perfect, yes, that's very true.
Sherisse Alexander:um, you know it. I think I'd said to you once in the last few months that you know we're talking about patterns of behavior. And I think I'd said to you once in the last few months that you know we're talking about patterns of behavior. And I think when this idea first made its way into my consciousness was I was reading a book by Byron Katie and it was I Need your Love. Is that True? And that's the first time where I was introduced to this idea. And I'm telling, and the reason why I'm bringing this up is because I remember feeling this extreme frustration around trying to understand, like I understood what she was saying, you know, logically, but how do I actually take myself through this process, uh, which you and I obviously talked about in recent months, which is like the questions, right, and I love the example that you gave, where you're like feeling this thing and I think, even just by saying, like you know, posing that question, where it's like, um, how did you phrase it?
Sherisse Alexander:Now, you were saying you know, how do I? What was it exactly you were saying? You were talking about like changing the cycle. Like you see it, how do I? What was it exactly you were saying. You were talking about, like changing the cycle. Like you see it, you acknowledge it, you want to move out of it, but you don't know how, you don't even know where to begin with the questions. And I remember for the longest time, even after reading that book by Byron Katie, I was still like and I read it like a couple of times, that's how confusing it was to me. And I think that's the point that I'm talking about is like, when you're stuck and you can see that there's this pattern of behavior, it's this story that I'm telling myself. I'm reading this book, I'm listening to this book, I'm asking myself these questions and it still does not make any sense to me. How do you push beyond that? That's what I'm asking.
Helen Ngyuen:Well, first step is to actually stop.
Sherisse Alexander:Stop reading the book.
Helen Ngyuen:No, to stop yourself and just say to your own mind is. I'll give you an example Helen, stop, Stop thinking about this and just to help quiet your mind down and then start asking yourself relative questions like is what's playing in your mind true or false? You need to ask even situations Did this person do this to you? Is that the truth? Was it false? If it's true, what event or details can you recall that makes it true? Once you start asking yourself critical questions like that, then what your mind does is it goes and looks through the files to find what is true. So the narrative you can always change.
Helen Ngyuen:It's not an easy task but it takes practice. It's like a muscle. You know what I mean? Yeah, so give yourself a visualization. If you can visualize like a big stop sign and say stop and you see that stop sign, automatically your mind will stop, it will stop thinking about it. So you have to add in to be able to visualize it. Yeah, to solidify it, because we can't see it and we hear this all the time. You can't see it. That means it's not there yeah, it's not real.
Sherisse Alexander:Yeah, it's not real. That's very true. That's very true. Um, you know, in my experience with you, I would say that what I've enjoyed most is like the journey from maybe not feeling, like, like I said, I had all these pieces of information that were like floating in my experience, as I've told you, and then, all of a sudden, you started to help me, like put them in their place, like where they were, where they're meant to be. How am I supposed to use these tools? So I what I'm curious about is, like you know, with your approach, where you focus on helping individuals realize mastery of their own experiences, how do you, how would you explain how you guide clients into actually recognizing the power that we all individually have? Really, because you did just say and I think everybody can also agree and acknowledge the mind is a ridiculously powerful thing. I don't even think we fully realize how powerful our thoughts are.
Helen Ngyuen:Well, I just help them realize their own gifts and talents, because everybody has them. How do you utilize that to help yourself? Right, because that's the whole point of it. My objective is not to have someone rely on me forever, you know, but to help them realize their own gifts so that they can utilize that and then give them little skill sets here and there and some tools to put in their belt so that they can go on their journey and someday right and hopefully that they can advance and help others in different ways as well. So I believe that everyone has gifts and talents and that's all I do. I really identify everyone's, help them identify their gifts and their talents. And you know what is uniquely to sheree, right? What's uniquely to help you know.
Helen Ngyuen:How I approach things are very different, too, than how you would approach things, because that's you, those are your tools and those are your gifts. So that's how I approach it. There's no set things in stone per se. Like you know, in in the life coaching world is very, very. It's a very vague, but the messages are all very similar. It's just how you use it, and understand how to use it is the key. Understand how to use it is the key.
Sherisse Alexander:Now for you. You've been working as an NLP practitioner. Sorry, how many years have you been an NLP practitioner? About two years now. Okay, two years Now, and your life coaching practice same period of time as well.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah, okay.
Sherisse Alexander:Now do you? Do you utilize other modalities within your?
Helen Ngyuen:you know the approach that you take with NLP. I do.
Sherisse Alexander:They're all very similar okay, what are some of the other modalities?
Helen Ngyuen:so some of the other modalities that we we utilize is actually, you know, body language.
Helen Ngyuen:So how people utilize body language, how they react to certain words and thoughts, right, and it tells you the extent of when they actually started having these traumatic moments, right. And also thought patterns, like what a series of different questions and how they answer would actually identify certain things. That they're thought patterns, right, that's part of NLP as well. But life coaching is not just about you know thinking positively and like, being like, okay, you know, put away the negative. But it actually goes deeper than that if you know how to utilize it. But it actually goes deeper than that if you know how to utilize it. And I always say you know, like, everyone needs to have the dark so that they can see the light, and that's what the yin and yang actually represents, by the way, right, without the contrast, you don't know the difference. So life coaching is teaching you how to see that. Yes, it's okay to have acceptance, right, but how do you get there, right? So there's different methods on how people utilize that as well, and I know that lots of people go by different methods, different modalities and what they believe in, and that's part of their style, I guess you would say. But in life coaching, you know, they're all very similar. To be honest, a lot of information out there is very recycled as well, but it just depends on how they apply and adapt to it. So, you know, it depends on people's goals as well.
Helen Ngyuen:Like, executive coaching is very different than, um, you know, relationship coaching right, and some people just want to learn a little bit more about themselves and create extra confidence, and that's different as well. Um, but it all plays from. Where did you stem from? Why did you start from here? And then we kind of like reverse engineer everything. So why are you stuck right? Yeah, so, like a car, you know you gotta fix certain parts. You might have to replace those parts right for it to actually continue to run smoothly. So that's where we're at right now okay.
Sherisse Alexander:So so with you know, and there's so many different approach. I mean you and I, you know, in our experience together. I love working with you because you know we do talk about definitely we have spoken about you know repetitive patterns and loops and getting stuck, and so I guess you know that's my experience. But have you had a situation or and obviously you don't need to give the details on it, but like where you know you've come into someone's experience, you're um opening their awareness to you, know the loop and how you tell yourself a different story or retrain your thought patterns? And there was this complete night and day. I mean I can say that for myself it's been like night and day and it's not always, it's not always apparent to people who are outside. It's very much an internal piece where it's like I feel different. But have you had an experience where it's like this person's life went from like zero to hero in like whatever the time frame is? Have you had that very rewarding experience or is it measured differently for you?
Helen Ngyuen:I don't think I would say mine was from zero to hero, um, I would say I broke it up into kind of like three stages, right. So, like I said, you know, everyone's journey is so different and each each day that I had to overturn that um happened actually very large things has happened in my life where I had to reinvent myself again so when they say you know like, oh, have you always been this way?
Helen Ngyuen:no, you actually can reinvent yourself multiple times in a lifetime, like you're supposed to, and people attach words. Like you know, you're evolving, right, so maybe you're taking this path and it's not the right path for you, so you have to actually take a U-turn and then go on a different path. Right, that happens all the time.
Sherisse Alexander:It sure does.
Helen Ngyuen:But it's because of the ego that doesn't allow people to actually make that U-turn sometimes, but they continue down a rabbit road. So for me, I would like to say that I never went from zero to hero per se, but I've had three major events that have happened in my life that I had to evolve, I had to change myself, I had to experience the depths of that pain so that I can rise again. And they always say you know, it's like a phoenix, why do you burn? And you, all of a sudden, you're alive again. Right, it's that transition. So I'm pretty sure whoever's listening to this can probably attest times in their life where they had to transition and become a different version of you, right?
Helen Ngyuen:So it was three times in my life. I can't say I went from zero to hero in one shot. I literally took three times and I'm hoping that I don't have to go through that again at this stage. But the first time it happened was 10 years old and that was really, really painful. And at 10, you know, not knowing anything, and that time you're just so innocent and it's like you know you would go to the park and just play and have no worries in the world. Well, let me say I grew up really fast at that age and next time was 18. 18, literally like nose dove and just play down, and it was so hard and that time I had to act spiritually. That's what was born out of it. I became more spiritual at 18 because I didn't believe in it before I did, but I didn't Got it.
Sherisse Alexander:That makes sense. Yes, absolutely.
Helen Ngyuen:So that's when my spirituality actually was born. Okay, at 18. At 18. Mm-hmm, and along that way, by the time I was 24, obviously, my daughter was born. So that wasn't a time where it was that deaf, but it was part of that journey of having faith in, like you know, trying to figure out your own strength and how to survive. You know, at the same time it's like who are you?
Helen Ngyuen:That decade was like really interesting, but you can see, I can see myself with that transition looking back now. Right, and then another time was the third time, like I said, was 32. When I was pregnant with my son and I was going through major, major financial hardship yeah, major, and I was like walking zombie and I had to transition then as well. So those three major points in my life really has I don't really like to use the word shaped or shaped myself, no, really has impacted my life in a way where you know I could have went the wrong way. You know I could have chosen not to make that U-turn and continue down that rabbit hole. But I noticed when I need to turn faster now instead of allowing things to get so bad and then make that turn right. So now it's like, okay, I get it, I get it, you know. So that's, that's how I would say. You know, those transitions are very important and I'm super grateful for them though.
Sherisse Alexander:Mm-hmm. Well, they're what shaped you. Okay, you don't like the terminology, but I mean it's an apt descriptor because it's, I don't want to say, reinventing ourselves, but I think where we sometimes get and you and I have obviously talked about this as well when we're in resistance of letting go of those old, old parts of ourselves that don't support who new versions are, and I don't know that you're ever really prepared for that, because it feels like there's a grieving process I don't even think it's even that you're fully cognizant or because you want to let go of these pieces of yourself that are not serving you. But it's also a nice comfy security blanket and it's very familiar and at least I know what I can expect. I can, even if it's everything is terrible. Well, at least I know what I can expect I can. Even if it's everything is terrible, well, at least I can expect that everything is terrible. So you know, it takes a lot of courage to be willing to let go and let that part of yourself die.
Sherisse Alexander:And you know the new, the new, whoever you are, come in to, to the experience. So, uh, you'd mentioned that. You know 18 is when your spirituality really started to take hold in your life. So I don't know that that means that there was necessarily a faith crisis, or if it was just like, as you said, there was an awareness but you really hadn't dove into it. So what did that transition piece look like? How did that change for you into it? So what did that transition?
Helen Ngyuen:piece look like. How did that change for you? That really changed for me at that point was because everything that I thought that I knew really I didn't know. And it's not about the failure per se of anything, it's really having that identity crisis as well. Right, and remember how I said to you like, who are you? You know? What do you want from me, god? You know I grew up as a Catholic, nevermind you. Yeah, you know, my mom's family side is Catholic, my dad's family side is Buddhist and I I actually had the privilege to learn both religion indeed a privilege.
Helen Ngyuen:And so different, like so different but I still felt like I didn't belong in, just either, you know. So, growing up with that and having that belief instilled in you and being like your mother telling you oh, you got to go to confession and all this other stuff. We got to go to church every Sunday, you know, and like I'm sitting there and I remember as a child I did not understand all of it. I was actually quite lost, yeah, and my mind wasn't grasping the information that was being fed to me, not to say that I don't believe in God. I do believe in God, I do believe that there's a higher power, but there was still that missing link and along that way, at 18, I found myself not wanting to know anything about God anymore and not wanting to know anything about Buddhism anymore, and not wanting to know anything about Buddhism anymore or anything else, and then I just went into a slump.
Helen Ngyuen:That is when I felt like things were taken away from me and just me losing faith and just really unhappy and being restrained, losing faith and just really unhappy and being restrained, you know, and like just feeling so tight that I couldn't breathe. And then I just and it was actually quite a dark time because you know, my relationship with my mom wasn't that good either at that time, so I was like feeling really alone and I was on my own. By the way, yeah, I was actually on my own since I was 15. So I actually lived on my own since I was 15. Believe it or not, nowadays, if you look at our children be like 15, what do you know?
Sherisse Alexander:I know are you are, you are you gonna survive out there at 15 by yourself probably not like our children at 15 still wants to go to the park and play.
Helen Ngyuen:It's just like that was me, yeah. So I found myself at 18 and just really lost and it came to a point where, you know, depression actually hit and not knowing it until actually I look back now that's what depression was. Yeah, because we didn't know what that was.
Sherisse Alexander:It wasn't talked about back then.
Helen Ngyuen:No, it was not talked about, and if there was something wrong in our culture, we don't talk about it period, like no one's allowed to know.
Helen Ngyuen:You know it's like it's something that you have to keep hush, hush, yeah. No, you know it's like, yeah, it's like it's it's something that you have to keep hush, hush, yeah, but that's truthfully. When I, like I said, you know I'm my spirituality was born at that time of my lowest, of lowest. I remember I can't even get out of bed. I remember just literally just sleeping and just not wanting to like exist. And it was a very, very dark, scary time because I would internalize that.
Helen Ngyuen:But I felt something that came up that my time here isn't done yet and that it had to be some, there has to be something more. And that's when I started getting curious again. Not to say it had happened overnight, no, it took years after that. But information kept coming in all different ways. It could be a sign driving down the road and all of a sudden my mind just went to a different space, right. So that's why I said, you know, generation of your darkest times. Sometimes you know new things can be born at that time because, like you said, you know that that's why life and death is very interesting, because doesn't when something dies, something else is born, right, being born.
Sherisse Alexander:Endings or beginnings.
Helen Ngyuen:New beginning, and this is a cycle of life. The same ways of your realization, how your loops are what you think in your mind. Anything can be reborn Either it's born again or something new that's being born. But you also have to give something up as well. So something has to die in order to have life again, or something. You get what I'm trying to say. Yeah, absolutely.
Sherisse Alexander:Well, it's really balanced. It is, you know my word, yeah.
Helen Ngyuen:By the way, of understanding what life is you know like and that's why I said you know sometimes we are in a loop or we play a narrative is because it has been taught to us. Not necessarily that is us, but as soon as you realize that now you can see where you go into that loop and where you can make those changes, changes.
Sherisse Alexander:And you know, when I think about my own journey, you know, and I look back on on what that felt like in that moment all those years ago. And you know, I think that for myself, you know, even before I started on this particular very focused spiritual journey, I would say, and even I was reflecting on it the other day and I'm like why would I say, why was I even saying that? And I think what I was saying to people is like I don't know why, but I know that my journey in this life is a spiritual one and I think everybody's is on some level. It's just whether or not you're cognizant or not, or consciously putting effort into it. But even so, the reflection was like why was I saying that? And I think I know the answer today, which was like that was my soul saying like you're going to go on a spiritual journey, whether you know it or not, like it's coming. So when that point came and you talk about those days where it's like you're so sad and you and it's so dark and it feels so lonely and you don't feel like you have like the support of your community or tribe or whatever the case may be. And you know, I've said on the podcast before, like I never really felt like I had a relationship with the church or God, or like, yes, god was an awareness, there is a God, god, yes, I believe in God.
Sherisse Alexander:But I remember it feeling so very confusing in terms of like, how do I even begin this journey? Like I know it's a journey that I want to go down. I feel like I need something that's bigger and outside of me, and it was just very overwhelming and confusing and I'm glad that I treated it like. I've read books where they're like you shouldn't treat it like going to a buffet, but I'm glad that I did. I'm glad that I was like, let me try this and see if this. I didn't know what I was searching for, but once I found it or I once I knew I was on the right path, it felt right. And so now I lean into that more instead of trying to be very logical with like this is what it should look like. It's like it feels right. And if it feels right, then I'm going. I'm going to keep going with this until it doesn't feel right.
Sherisse Alexander:So, and I think the reason why I'm saying this very much in this particular spot is because of that feeling of being in that place where you start that search. And so then, for you, you got curious how did that then? How did you? Because it's evolved, it's not like you said. When you grew up, it was Catholicism and Buddhism, and I don't. You said neither of them fit. So how did that then evolve into what it is today?
Helen Ngyuen:Well, I would say my intuition. My intuition has always been strong, even as a child, and it was funny because, you know, they always say you know, we're very, everyone's very intuitive and you should listen to your gut, right? Your gut instinct. You know it's separate from the logical mind. Obviously, the logical mind is only there to keep you healthy or somewhat healthy and alive, right, but your gut is what tells you a lot more and, going into, you know, you want to label it spiritual or non-spiritual, whatever it is like, you're right, it has to feel right, right, and at that time it helped my shift, my emotions. Like anybody can say things to you like oh, stop thinking that, think positively, and stuff like that. Does it really work? No, you have to change the emotional response and that's what happened. Somehow, someway, I got curious and all of this came about and shifted my emotional response without even me noticing, and that's what got me out of it that's remarkable, like that, that piece right there that you just because we get so.
Sherisse Alexander:And I keep chuckling when you say just be positive. I was having a conversation with somebody yesterday where I was literally before I even got a chance to say anything. The person was like and I don't want to hear anything about verbiage, I don't hear anything about positivity.
Sherisse Alexander:I got really defensive to be able to really question the emotional response in, whatever the stimulus was for that, because that like takes a real willingness to you know. Ask yourself to me the first question is okay, why am I feeling this way? Okay, what, what am I really? But why am I really if I, if I take this external stimuli out of this conversation and strip that piece away from it, what is the real thing that is making me feel the way that I am right now? Which to me I think actually I was just reading this book about Buddhism yesterday is one of the tenets of Buddhism, right Like the suffering piece that we go through. And really, what is that all about? It's again, always the story that we're telling ourselves.
Helen Ngyuen:So I'm amazed that you were able to do that without anybody else to help you shift that yeah, that was the hard part, because we're not allowed to kind of like talk about these things back then, because that's what we were taught, you know, um. But I am grateful that I actually understood that. You know, even in Buddhism like you're speaking about Buddhism, you know nowhere there it tells you that you're never going to suffer. We are here to suffer, to learn. Yeah, it's just. How do we navigate through it? Is our mission, how can we navigate through it seamlessly and experience it? And that's why you know a lot of people when they're like oh, think positively, not negatively. Well, that really just doesn't work all too well because you're missing pieces. Yeah, like the engine can't run without a transmission, so it's kind of like that, right, so you got to add more parts to it. And you're right. You have to try to start asking those questions like emotionally why are you feeling like that? That's the biggest piece.
Sherisse Alexander:I think also something else that you said that I thought was really valuable.
Sherisse Alexander:Right, there is the suffering piece, and I don't want anybody to understand what, what we're.
Sherisse Alexander:No, life is not suffering, but life is suffering. It's, you know, two sides of really the same coin and the you know, really, ultimately, the whole purpose of even this podcast, which is like, how do we find the grace and the ease and how do we look at the challenges and obstacles that come up and make us feel a certain way? How do we actually lean into that and like wrap and that's a really tricky one, that that's one where it's like, okay, I'm steeped in all this pain and all this hurt and I really want to lean in and wrap my arms around it, but often you can't until you're on the other side. So what's maybe one tip that you can like and nothing super deep, because it's such a huge shift anyways as it is to like look at the things that come up that are so painful and then, and then, looking at it as really some kind of blessing, what would you say to somebody who might be steeped in in that place right now?
Helen Ngyuen:It's just be allowed, allow it to flow through and you know how. You know it's so weird. This is actually coming up, but it's almost like when you have a cut on your finger and you accidentally touch something with alcohol. What does that feel like? Stinging, that stinging, right, that sting, but you have to endure it and it'll just pass. It's the same thing. If you just be and just know that this is painful and I always say God always gives you tears for a reason it's for relief, right you need to cry, cry. If you need to just sit there and not do anything and just be in this swamp, then do it. But also give yourself a time and, being like I'm giving myself today to do this, let it all out, have the intentions of releasing and feeling that pain, and then, when you allow all of that to pass through, you'll see it's just like that cut with alcohol on it. It will stop stinging.
Sherisse Alexander:Right, it's very cathartic. I've learned over the years how to honor that part of myself so much so much more today. Um, where it's like if I'm in a mood and I'm going through something like I know obviously I know when I'm in a mood and and I think where I still struggle personally with that is like I'm very okay to keep myself by myself when I'm in a mood and say and just ignore people, I'm very okay with doing that.
Sherisse Alexander:But I think where I personally still struggle is I think people in my experience have this expectation that I'm going to be on and I'm going to be sunshiny and bright and be like, just be positive and the truth is is I don't always feel like that and you know, especially if you work, you know it's getting better now.
Sherisse Alexander:I think that there's definitely a lot more support, we'll say, in the workplace and people to honor and respect, like, oh, they need a, they need a personal health day or a personal day, that kind of thing. But I think there's still some environments where that's not necessarily so acceptable. So that's where I struggle, which is the judgment? Well, maybe it's because I'm judging myself is really what it is. I can see you nodding. She's nodding.
Helen Ngyuen:Yes, nobody's judging me. The question is, how do you know that's true?
Sherisse Alexander:Well, that's what I just said. I'm like, oh you know what. Actually, what's occurring to me is I'm actually judging myself for taking a mental health day to, you know, have a cathartic release. So see, helen, how you always help me with everything. But, yes, I think that and, like I said, I and I love seeing the shift actually in this next generation. I think it's again I'm going to use the word remarkable because you talked about, you know we don't talk about it in our you know any issues or challenges with our parents and their generation, but now it's a totally different ballgame.
Helen Ngyuen:It's a totally at least in my experience but, like now, people are talking about it.
Sherisse Alexander:You know their boundaries, you know how their process, like the. This is the verbiage that's being openly and widely used and I'm celebrating it because for me it's like one generation. One generation and now we have this entire platform forum so many of them for people to openly talk about what's on their mind and people honoring that really.
Helen Ngyuen:Well, it's where we're going into a new era, if you really think about it, like we came from a generation of many generations of suppression, right, the emotional, the emotion suppression that's happening in generation after generation is actually causing ourselves to deteriorate. So, if you really think about it, that's energy, right? So how do you exude that energy and how you intake that energy? You're going to start learning more about that every time you start feeling something, because emotions is a very powerful way to expel or receive energy, and that's why now, I think, people are more aware of it, and that being suppressed is actually not advancing you as a human being. So that's why they're trying to be more freely in terms of expression, and we're teaching our kids how to express right now. Yes, because we were taught the opposite. We're the generation that's going to change the generations that follows after that, if that makes sense, yeah absolutely, and I found myself having this exact conversation, like definitely more of these conversations.
Sherisse Alexander:So, even though older generations have not necessarily been open, it's crazy, I think I'd said to one of my kids I'm like it's amazing what happens once you become an adult and you get to sit at the adult table. I said now I'm having these conversations with my parents and my aunts where it's like you know, did you view your own? You know these personal things that nobody ever wanted to talk about and now they're open to talking about it, which I obviously welcome because for so many years it was just never talked about. And the importance of how do we bring that connection or recognize that connection in mind body and spiritual health right, because, as I've often said and I found myself saying a lot recently, I believe that all disease starts with dis-ease in any of those sectors right Mind, body and spirit.
Sherisse Alexander:And I think that even with our older generations, we can see some. What was I saying to somebody recently Like you can work out as much as you want, you can eat as much as you eat as healthy as you want, drink as much water, take all the supplements and still become ill because we have not addressed this dis-, this disease in one of these sectors. So how do you help people recognize that interconnectedness between these things? Because I don't know if everybody believes that or I think we're at the beginning of that, maybe not right at the beginning. Very eye-opening.
Helen Ngyuen:And this was about five years ago and that's when, actually six years ago now, because my dad found out he had cancer. And you were talking about a man here that's super healthy. Okay, he has no high blood pressure, nothing, no meds, nothing. He is super healthy. Why did this man have cancer? And I always often ask myself that question. But duration of his four-year battle of cancer, I've realized that he was so emotionally, literally like stuck. And there was this one conversation I had with him that I totally remember because this has really made me understand where this is all coming from. And he was telling me about his past and as a young child, right, and how he felt at certain points, how his father made him feel which is my grandfather, and at the end of it he just said to me he's like I'm truthfully don't feel like he, like grandpa, ever loved me. That suppression of that emotion and carrying that weight around for so long has finally came and show root because he didn't heal from it. Yeah, and, like I said, you know you're very right, these diseases start from the one of those sectors. He's physically super healthy, let me tell you, like the man at 60-something has still a six-pack, like you know, like he doesn't work out or anything, he's just not. He was just healthy. He didn't have any meds, nothing, and he was very active in terms of working and he worked all his life, nevermind. But he was very suppressed because he would never talk about his emotions. But it took him that long to that period and at the end of his life, all he's ever said was you need to live your best life now. Yeah, you know, that was his last message and this is a has opened my eyes a lot because I was like you.
Helen Ngyuen:We do live in a society where we're taught how to suppress, and for him, he realized that he didn't need to suppress all of that and I was able to sit there and help him work through things, even though he didn't know what was happening, you know, and I knew. But I was helping him work through a lot of things before his time is up and I was super honored and so grateful that I had that opportunity to do so because, you know, the worst thing that happened is him, you know, taking his last breath and not healing from any of that, and that would be so, so sad, you know. So for me, that's why I mean by the older generation, and exactly what you said. I truthfully believe that diseases are born from, you know, not taking care of one of those sectors. You know your mind, body and spirit and, quite truthfully, you're very disconnected and that was my first time experience of actually seeing it happen in real lifetime.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah, you know, I wish that you know he could stay longer, but his mission wasn't to stay that long, so it was very interesting at how it all came about. I mean, he passed away for two years now, you know, and he's still very much alive around, still Like I can still feel him around, I can still. You know, there's essence of us. Just because we leave the world doesn't mean that we don't leave traces right, absolutely.
Sherisse Alexander:You know and as you were sharing that, and thank you for sharing that you know, and as you were sharing that, and thank you for sharing that, I don't know.
Sherisse Alexander:I think that there's obviously there's value in having these conversations with older generations, but I think that in some way it can even free you as an individual from a story that you might be telling yourself, right, because even when you were saying that and I think our family backgrounds are very, they're very, similar and those stories and I know, with some of the books that I've read, that often you know, when we're carrying wounds from childhood that might be rooted in our relationships with our parents, that often one of the suggestions is like envision your parent as like their inner child, because we're always so steeped in our own pain.
Sherisse Alexander:But, and I think once I started to look at my parents and with the knowledge that I have of their upbringing and their experience, I think, once I was able to understand and even talk with them about some of the things that they would have experienced, then it really allows you to be like, oh, they really are just doing the very best they can with the tools and not just you know, in an idea, but now this person that you, they're your parent, and now they're telling you like this was you know for your dad to say, that would have been huge, that would have been such a huge thing for him to be able to finally vocalize, like, going his entire life not thinking or feeling that his, his dad, loved him, like how lonely it's. It makes it sad.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah, it is very sad, it is very sad but I was super proud of him to be able to vocalize that because you got to remember him to be able to vocalize that because you, you gotta remember this is a man where he's never told me that he loved me, if he didn't know how.
Helen Ngyuen:He has never came and gave hugs or kisses only as a baby, obviously, but I don't remember that you know, but as he grew older, like it never happened right and for him to vocalize that he felt like he was never loved it. It kind of like it felt.
Helen Ngyuen:I felt that hurt you know, so sometimes you know, we we have to give, we have to be. Give our parents a little bit more grace, because, especially if you grew up in an immigrant family, you have to understand that they were never taught how to love. They just had to know that they were loved. But how to love they were never taught that because they were never. Their parents never expressed it to them. So how do you teach someone as?
Helen Ngyuen:a kid yeah, if you don't do it yourself Absolutely. And they always say monkey see, monkey do right. If kids don't see that, guess what? The kids don't do it.
Sherisse Alexander:But you know, kudos to us and even to your dad for being really vocal within that right, because I definitely remember having that conversation and your dad probably never even asked his dad like hey, do you love me? Like that would have never even entered his consciousness. I don't think to have that conversation because it just wasn't done.
Helen Ngyuen:It was the only thing that I feel that for my dad was obviously my grandfather passed away years before that that I wish that he actually realized that before it happened. But you know, everything is in divine timing and sometimes we experience things at different levels at different times and we don't have control over that at all. So that's why, like at that given moment, I think for him you know, his last mission here on Earth is to kind of patch up these holes before he had to go right, and I, so happened, was the one who had to sit there and help him understand. You know, if that narrative is not true, yeah, right, so I actually got him to actually re relive and rethink some moments that, like, really attached them together. Yeah, and that was a beautiful moment, because I can see it in my dad's eyes and like, oh, maybe I was thinking of this all wrong.
Helen Ngyuen:The understanding, yeah, absolutely, that my grandfather did love him, but it was just shown very differently, right, and help him recall these happy memories, because they all have sad memories and happy memories. But, again, that only helps you to see the contrast of things. Yes, how do you know if it's good If you don't know what's bad, very true. So you need to have a combination of both and equal balance in life. So I helped him really look at both sides and you can see it in his eyes. He didn't admit it, obviously, because you know they don't like to admit that they're wrong in anything right. So I just I got the confirmation through his eyes and I'm like okay, and that I think he's he was able to let that go slowly. It was decades and decades of carrying. You know what I mean?
Sherisse Alexander:Yeah, well, that's what I'm saying what a great story that he was able to at least reconcile that before he passed, because that would have been as you were telling. Like I said, as you were telling a story. I thought it was very sad that he hadn't been carrying that for so long. So then it makes me think about all the other baby boomers that are out there nursing all this hurt over you know, their, the stories that they're telling themselves, that probably don't have a lick of truth in them, and recognizing that you know, our ancestors, all of them have gone through. Each generation has their own challenges that they have to go through, and it's not necessarily a reflection of how they feel about us. So I know, in my own personal experience with my parents. So I know in my own personal experience with my parents, something super cute happened, like a week or two ago, and I was totally caught off guard. I was leaving my parents house and my dad is not a big hugger. My mom will hug me, but my dad is not a big hugger and as I was leaving, he like I was just gonna be like, okay, bye dad, but he was. But he was like he opened his arms. I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm getting a hug. So you know they are, they're growing and they're changing and they're learning.
Sherisse Alexander:And I think having these dialogues is us and everybody really around saying it's totally okay to like. You have feelings, so you should express them. And I think sometimes that's where the message gets lost. Is that I find myself saying to people often you should have your feelings are there for a reason. They're telling you that there's something that you need to peel back the layer on. It's what you do with those feelings. It's not a license to lose your shit. It's an, it's a, it's a nudging to dig deeper and ask yourself some different questions. So I was really proud of my dad for doing something really simple like opening his arms.
Sherisse Alexander:I know right.
Helen Ngyuen:Oh, trust me, if you ever saw how my dad like awkwardly allows us to hug like stiff as a board. There's definitely like that with my mom when first started hugging you would be like, okay, okay, let's get this over with.
Sherisse Alexander:This. Is what is this that we're doing here? And you know, it's funny that as children, I don't think my parents had any issues like holding us, and so where the shift? Where did the thing come in? Where it was all of a sudden like you're not supposed to hug, you're not supposed to show affection, like I obviously don't remember, but I've seen my parents with babies, so I know how they are well, I came to a conclusion where you know our parents well.
Helen Ngyuen:My parents, especially, came from a country of war too, Right yeah. And then my grandparents and great-grandparents, like they had to live through it, Right so duration of that time there is no like soft emotions, Like you suck it up. This is what it is. You do not cry, you don't make a peep or you'll get killed. It's survival, so it's very killed.
Sherisse Alexander:It's survival, so it's very different Survival.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah, very different. And emotions back then it's you know, it's a very scary time, yeah, and you don't have the luxury of expressing how you feel, right, that time you're just in survival mode, so you suppress all of that. You're not happy. Well, I'm not happy too, right? How can you live happy when outside is chaos and people are dying, people are just dropping dead, and all you hear at nighttime are gunshots and bombs and all this other stuff? Like, how do you live through it? Happily, right. So it's very different in trying to shift that now, right.
Helen Ngyuen:So I believe in, depending on the era and the time, yeah, what was learned there? And then it gets passed down and then sooner or later it kind of thins out, because we don't live through that now, we don't see that.
Sherisse Alexander:So grateful, so grateful.
Helen Ngyuen:And our children can walk safely on the streets and not have to worry about it. You know, like we don't have these worries like they did. Like my parents escaped the country. Yeah, I hoped you know so. My parents had to grow up really fast and they didn't even know what love was really. How to teach that.
Sherisse Alexander:You know like well it was survival and I think that's even like you know, even as you were, you were talking about that right, um, coming from a country of war, you know, and immediately when you said that you know what I had gratitude that I had the privilege of not having to ever even think about that.
Sherisse Alexander:It's my entire life has never, has always, been about let me pause now. You know it's never. I've never had to worry about survival, and I think you know, in saying that, the relevance is, I mean, I think I said to somebody recently that, you know, the biggest impact that I've had in my travels to Nigeria is understanding that, really understanding that my experience has been said. There's, of course, saying it like, oh, I have a different experience, versus really being entrenched somewhere and seeing and really starting to understand that when you're, the challenges that you come up against are so different, like food, clothing and shelter is practically taken for granted in this environment in many other regions of the world. That's, that's, it's not, it's not, it's not a a natural, assumed thing. So, um, but you know, we're, we're all growing and evolving and learning and experiencing, and it's you know in a lot of ways.
Helen Ngyuen:Yeah, you know what's crazy, as you were saying that. Literally you know we learn from our kids, right? Yeah, our parents do learn from us too. They learn how to live more courage that's very true With courage, because we live our life with courage. They wonder how can we do all these things and live loudly while they are in this small box. And now they're like okay, let's, let's get out of the box. Now you know they're seeing more and they're like, they're wide eyed because they're like how can you do that? And they're learning that from us how to get out of that, of that box well, I'm happy if my parents are learning something from us.
Sherisse Alexander:I don't know that they would necessarily admit it. But I mean, we got a hug. I tell you that much, we will never admit it.
Helen Ngyuen:They will never even admit it when they're wrong you know, I don't think I've ever had an apology actually, but I had to. I just have to accept that, that's you know. For them it's like it's not because they don't want to apologize. That's all it is.
Sherisse Alexander:But, you know, I think it ultimately boils down to this, similar to the exercise that you obviously did with your dad, where it, like you know, really go back through your, your memo bank and and see, like, look at it with a different lens. You know, and that's one of my favorite sayings of yours and I'm going to say it here again because I'm sure I've said it before which is like be the spectator in your own movie, yep, and whenever I say that, yeah, and when I say that to someone, they're always like, well, that is so much easier said than done. Yes, you're right, it is.
Sherisse Alexander:But if you keep, practicing being the spectator in your own movie, it becomes easier. And so then, when you say you have this feeling, I can literally take that feeling, put a pin in it and say, okay, I'm going to put a pin in this, I'm going to come back and revisit this thing later because there's something important here. Back and revisit this thing later because there's something important here, but right now I'm tuned into this moment and whatever is happening in this moment. So, um, in closing, uh, what would you like to share in terms of, like, what's next for you, what's coming up? You, you have many things that you're working on. What would you like the listeners today to know?
Helen Ngyuen:as you know, parting words from Helen- I would say you know, the best advice that I have ever been given was to never close a door unless you are able to close it yourself, which means that when opportunities come, just walk through the door. Don't be afraid, because when we're open to receiving like that, you're going to see your life change and shift in ways that you have never thought it would. And this is where your mind would stop you. At the front of the door, be like oh wait, we don't know, we don't have enough data. Don't walk through the door.
Helen Ngyuen:It might be dangerous, like my job is keep you safe and alive, right, but tell yourself, what if you don't walk through the door? What if on the other side there's just abundance of things that you can learn and experience and like gain from. And again, your mind will always play that and because the topic today is the loops that you play in, it's like you know, don't, don't limit yourself. I say go for it, try everything as much as you can, whatever you can or can't do. You don't know that until you try.
Sherisse Alexander:Sometimes, I think, a reminder. I had a conversation with somebody where they were terrified to walk through the door. They called me to put me on blast because they were terrified to walk through the door on something and I just said to them I'm like it's just a baby step, stop thinking 23 steps down the road. Just take this moment right now. You have this opportunity. It's exciting you, and I think it's your excitement that's terrifying you. Just take one teeny, tiny, itty bitty step. That's it. Or be willing to, that's another way to phrase it. Are you willing to, even if you're not willing to take the step? Are you willing to think about taking the step and that's not the battle, right, yeah, absolutely.
Sherisse Alexander:I mean, it's like this podcast, right, the podcast is such a great analogy. Because I'm glad you didn't let me not do it, so thank you for that. I'm glad you didn't let me not do it, so thank you for that. Well, and thank you, helen, again for joining me today and sharing a little bit about your story and some of your journey and some of the tips and tricks on, you know, pulling yourself out of repetitive loops and behavioral patterns. And until we meet again, I know there's more that we plan to do, but thank you for joining today. I appreciate it.
Helen Ngyuen:Oh, thank you for having me. It's such an honor Indeed. Thank you.
Sherisse Alexander:Thank you again for joining me and Helen today as we chatted about NLP and telling yourself different stories so you can change the outcome of your life. If you enjoyed today's content and continue to enjoy it, please continue to listen at Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And again, as always, if you have any questions, content, idea, anything like that, please reach out to me at Cherise at your collectiveca. That's S H E R I S S E at your collectiveca, and until next time, take care of yourself.